the road to change only starts when you take the first step

a grudge…..what is it to you?

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"Holding a grudge is like letting someone live rent free in our heads," 
I'm pretty positive there isn't a person alive who hasn't heard that quote a million times. But does it really, though? What does that even entail, to let it live rent free in your head? Does that imply that every single day of your life you have to devote a portion of time to this grudge? Or is it as simple as the space that it lives in only ever gets noticed when the topic of the grudge arises or is presented in the flesh? 

Now lets present the question: "What is a grudge to you?". And lets determine if it deserves that rent free space in our head. A persistent feeling of ill-will or resentment resulting from a past insult or be resentfully unwilling to give, grant or allow /something/. That's the definition of holding a grudge, so by those standards anything from "you stole a pencile from me in third grade", to "I won't allow you to talk to me in that same way ever again", constitutes a grudge. That's a broad spectrum of things a person could potentially hold a grudge over or give multiple grudges that infamous space in our heads. 

Now we know a good majority of the world believes that letting those go is the way to be. That if your hands are too full of carrying the grudges you have in life, you won't be able to catch the blessings that are falling into your life. I can absolutely see that, especially if you're carrying around petty grudges that are a waste of your time and energy. Even when it comes to the bigger things in life, if someone has done you so wrong that you're becoming consumed with anger and it's effecting relationships with the people around and the people you have the potential to meet, and those potential outcomes of these meetings could have been something grand. Now, in those situations I can see the need to let go of those grudges to save your mental health, well-being and your relationships. 

On the opposite side of that coin you have those who nurse those grudges, who believe that they have to hold onto those moments, those of disrespect and blatant disregard for your feelings or wants or needs, as a reminder to never let such events ever occur to them or anyone in their direct vicinity again. They have endured and they have suffered through, to where now this grudge is no longer a unwanted visitor but a needed advisor to never let such things transpire to them or others. In those cases is the grudge even a grudge at that point anymore or is it a needed life lesson? If that's the case, would it be smart to let such things go? Would you let them happen again if you let them go?

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